This is your story!

Whether I was a so-called "good" person, or a so-called "bad" person before I met Jesus, the fact is I was a lost person in need of rescue. That's what today is all about. Jesus rescuing me and you through his death on the Cross.

For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost. - Luke 19:10

And this life-changing relationship I have with him is not meant to be privately cherished or fearfully hidden from the public. It is meant to be shared!

When I think of sharing my life story with others, my thoughts never, ever go to what I have done to achieve closeness with him. Joining a particular denomination, reciting certain prayers, or performing specific religious duties does not result in a thriving, joyful relationship with my heavenly Father. Intimacy with God is not accomplished by following a list of do’s and don’ts.

Rather, my life story and the intimacy I experience with my Father is all about him…who he is…how he rescued me…listening to him speak directly to me through his word…the peace he gives me in ‘hopeless’ circumstances…the way he never tires of me, but continues to affectionately pursue me…the miraculous transformation only he could ever make in my naturally sinful heart and mind…resulting in an entirely different “me” with entirely different desires and plans than the “me” who first believed in him.

When you are tempted to work for God’s love…remember the Cross.

When you are bogged down by the weight of your sin…remember the Cross.

When you start to act as though your salvation can be earned or paid back…remember the Cross.

The Cross is evidence of God’s all-consuming love for you. It is evidence that Christ fully paid the price for your sin once and for all. There are no remaining interest payments or hidden taxes he left as your responsibility. And the Resurrection is evidence of his mighty power at work within you. On the day of your salvation, forgiveness was not your only immediate blessing. You were blessed with a whole new life - and this life is to be lived by faith and in the power of the Spirit. In fact, if you are not continuously surrendering to the Spirit, you are not living ‘in Christ’ at all.

Do you need to surrender once again today? Bow at the Cross. Rejoice at the empty grave! This is your story - and that story is meant to be shared.

Reversing a guilty verdict!

Wanting to satisfy the crowd, Pilate released Barabbas to them. He had Jesus flogged, and handed him over to be crucified. - Mark 15:15

Now the men who were holding Jesus in custody were mocking him as they beat him. - Luke 22:63

As we read through the sufferings of Christ, we find that he was ‘scourged’ or ‘flogged’ under the orders of Pilate. The practice of flogging was a legal preliminary to every Roman execution because it weakened the victim through shock and blood loss.

When flogged, the Roman soldiers used an instrument that was like a short whip with several leather thongs of varying lengths, in which small iron balls or sharp pieces of sheep bones were tied at intervals. Jesus would have endured these blows while tied to a post in a bent position and unlike Jewish laws that only allowed 39 lashes (13 on the chest and 13 on each shoulder) there were no limits whatsoever to the number of lashes that could be inflicted by the Romans, nor were they restricted to these areas.

Jesus was cruelly tortured and severely mutilated so you and I could be completely healed and beautifully whole. In order to further ridicule Jesus, the soldiers made a “crown of thorns” and placed it on his head.

They stripped him and put a scarlet robe on him, and then twisted together a crown of thorns and set it on his head. They put a staff in his right hand. Then they knelt in front of him and mocked him. “Hail, king of the Jews!” they said. They spit on him, and took the staff and struck him on the head again and again. After they had mocked him, they took off the robe and put his own clothes on him. Then they led him away to crucify him. - Matthew 27:28-31

The NET Bible describes it this way:

The crown of thorns was a crown plaited of some thorny material, intended as a mockery of Jesus’ “kingship.”

Traditionally it has been regarded as an additional instrument of torture, but it seems more probable the purpose of the thorns was not necessarily to inflict more physical suffering but to imitate the spikes of the “radiant corona,” a type of crown portrayed on ruler’s heads on many coins of the period; the spikes on this type of crown represented rays of light pointing outward (the best contemporary illustration is the crown on the head of the Statue of Liberty in New York harbor**).

Can you even imagine? The sinless Son of God was being mocked, beaten, and spit upon by those whom he loved so deeply. And yet the people took perverse pleasure in his pain, oblivious to the fact that he was enduring it all for them. The pain of Jesus served a colossal purpose – he purchased our pardon. (Very Christian-ese of me, huh? Our pardon.) But I adore the meaning. The Holman Illustrated Bible Dictionary defines pardon as: “Authoritative act reversing a sentence given under a guilty verdict.”

We are indeed guilty. And without Christ, a sentence of death is guaranteed. But Jesus, in effect, walked into the courtroom of our sentencing and said, “I’ll pay the price for her freedom! She is guilty, but punish me instead.” And God did.

“He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; “by his wounds you have been healed.” - 1 Peter 2:24

Jesus suffered indescribable pain to rescue you from death. We will experience a certain amount of pain in life. And when we do, it is an opportunity to follow the example of Jesus by bringing glory to the Father. But be on your guard! When we endure hardship, it is a prime opportunity for our adversary, the devil, to creep in and turn us into angry, bitter, unforgiving Spirit-starved people. When we suffer pain, we have a choice to make, just like Jesus did. Will we love others in spite of our suffering, breathing grace into the lives of those we know, and bringing glory to the Father? Or will we turn our thoughts inward, focusing on self (self-pity, self-loathing, self-righteousness, self-destruction, etc.) which brings about the unintended consequence of leading those around us astray?

We can use our power of influence for God's glory. We can love others with the over-the-top grace and forgiveness we have received from our King Jesus. He has reversed our guilty verdict. We are no longer living under a death sentence. Jesus has set us free - and we are FREE indeed!


*Biblical Studies Press. (2006; 2006). The NET Bible First Edition Notes (Jn 19:2). Biblical Studies Press.
**Brand, C., Draper, C., England, A., Bond, S., Clendenen, E. R., Butler, T. C., & Latta, B. (2003).

The Cost of being a Christian

The following is a very close paraphrase from J.C. Ryle's Holiness outlining the 4 costs of being a Christian. I wanted to be able to refer back to this and take it to heart, so I personalized it with "I" throughout instead of "he" as was originally written.

1. It will cost me my self-righteousness.
I must cast away all pride and high thoughts, and conceit of my own goodness. I must be content to go to heaven as a poor sinner saved only by free grace, and owing all to the merit and righteousness of another. I must be willing to give up all trust in my own morality, respectability, praying, Bible-reading, Church-going, and sacrament-receiving, and trust in nothing but Jesus Christ. To be a true Christian it will cost my self-righteousness.

2. It will cost me my sins.
I must be willing to give up every habit and practice which is wrong in God’s sight. I must set his face against it, quarrel with it, break off from it, fight with it, crucify it, and labor to keep it under, whatever the world around me may say or think. I must do this honestly and fairly. There must be no separate truce with any special sin which I love. I must count all sins as deadly enemies, and hate every false way. Whether little or great, whether open or secret, all my sins must be thoroughly renounced. To be a Christian it will cost me my sins.

3. It will cost me my love of ease.
This also sounds hard. There is nothing I naturally dislike so much as ‘trouble’ about my religion. I hate trouble. I secretly wish I could have a ‘vicarious’ Christianity, and could be good by proxy, and have everything done for me. Anything that requires exertion and labor is entirely against the grain of my heart. But the soul can have ‘no gains without pains.’ To be a Christian it will cost a me my love of ease.

4. It will cost me the favor of the world.
I must be content to be thought ill of by others. I must count it no strange thing to be mocked, ridiculed, slandered, persecuted, and even hated. I must not be surprised to find my opinions and practices in religion despised and held up to scorn. I must submit to be thought by many a fool, an enthusiast, and a fanatic – to have my words perverted and my actions misrepresented. In fact, I must not marvel if some call me mad. I dare say this also sounds hard. I naturally dislike unjust dealing and false charges, and think it very hard to be accused without cause. I should not be flesh and blood if I did not wish to have the good opinion of my neighbors. It is always unpleasant to be spoken against, and forsaken, and lied about, and to stand alone. But there is no help for it. The cup which our Master drank must be drunk by His disciples. I must be ‘despised and rejected of men’ (Isaiah 53:3). To be a Christian it will cost me the favor of the world.

Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul? {Matthew 16}

What do I do now?

God has me in a season of rest. But it hasn't been easy. More often than I'd like to admit, I've felt more restless than restful. Most days there is a pleading question on my lips and in my heart, "Hello, God, did you forget I exist?" Over the past decade, I went from a woman who got up every day and faithfully put on my garment of shame and regret, to a woman scandalously set free by the love of my amazing Savior, to a woman who had the immense joy and privilege of serving alongside a team of sisters in Christ in ministry for 5 years, to a woman who ... what is it I do now?

And that's the crux of the matter. What do I "do" now? In a season of rest, one should be happy to rest, right? Yet in a culture of "do this" and "do that" and "do more" and always "do, do, do SOMETHING," we feel insignificant, unimportant, overlooked, and even useless unless we are doing something. Oh, and of course that "something" must be significant in our own estimation or we still feel as though we're failing God, or others, or ourselves, or all of the above.

In our world, we long to be included, important, and intimately cared for by someone who truly loves us. No one wants to be ignored, insignificant...put out to pasture.

In God's world, we are included, important, and intimately cared for by Someone who truly loves us. We are never ignored, insignificant, and when we are put out to pasture, it's a good thing not a bad thing! It's a place of rest. Not a place of abandonment.

I'm still learning this. I'm talking to me! And maybe, just maybe, God is talking to you today as well.

God is quite content to put us in seasons where there appears to be no forward movement, where life comes to a screeching halt. It's here where we learn that we're not what we do; we're simply someone he enjoys. - Susie Larson

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he refreshes my soul.

Father, teach me to thoroughly enjoy you; as much as you thoroughly enjoy me.

See that mess? Let it go.

You know that gut-wrenching feeling when someone hurts you, does something seriously wrong, doesn't seem to care, maybe even seems prideful about it, moves happily along, and leaves you with a gaping heart wound?

It's a bad feeling no matter what, but it's amplified many times over when inflicted by a fellow believer, by someone you thought you could trust, by someone who knows better. You're left wondering, "How could this possibly happen in the family of God?" It's the kind of overwhelming pain that causes you to feel physically ill at times. And to top it off, that's not the worst part.

The worst part is the sin it spawns in your own heart and mind.

Yep. That's right. What started off as someone else's sin, has now begun its destructive work in your life. Like a cancer that silently spreads, the signs and symptoms progressively manifest until it's obvious something is very, very wrong in you.

And just like we all hate cancer, I venture to guess we all hate the effect of someone else's sin in our heart. I mean, really. You were going along your merry way, and BOOM! someone up and disrupts your life with their yucky junk. And once the damage is done, it can take several weeks (or months! or years!) to work through what happened. You see, it isn't enough to simply know you have a heart problem. You can know all day long your heart has developed some serious life-altering problems, but knowledge alone is not an automatic fix to becoming healthy and whole.

The sad reality of unresolved conflict is that it typically leads to more sin than was originally present. Some very ugly feelings and unwelcome questions arise as a result of being wronged; especially when the wrong is not righted through biblical peacemaking.

Feelings like:

Anger - a strong feeling of displeasure and belligerence aroused by a wrong
Resentment - a feeling of indignant displeasure or persistent ill will at something regarded as a wrong, insult, or injury
Bitterness - anger and disappointment at being treated unfairly; resentment
Unforgiveness - not disposed to forgive or show mercy; unrelenting
Pride - a feeling that you are more important or better than other people

Those are strong words with strong meanings. Did you catch some of them? Belligerence. Persistent ill will. Unrelenting. Better than. Yeah, that's ugly, alright. And the irony is, you may have seen these sinful attitudes in the person who wronged you - yet now those same feelings have taken root in you - perhaps exacerbated by their unwillingness to be at peace with you. It's a vicious cycle the enemy loves and surely makes the Savior weep.

And questions like:

What did I do to deserve this animosity, opposition, betrayal?
How on earth is God not dealing with the wrong things he/she did?
Why does he/she get to go on as if nothing happened, with no accountability, well-respected by others, and serving God to boot?
When will I be able to move past these yucky feelings?

I'm sure some of you could add your own feelings and questions to the list, couldn't you? But that's the bad news. The good news is this: we don't have to remain stuck with these feelings and questions.

We have a God who redeems and restores. And while that broken relationship may never be redeemed or restored, God can do miraculous things inside a person with a willing mind and a pliable heart.

Of all the things God has taught me in life, one of the hardest and most repeated lessons over the past 10 years has been: let it go.

I'm tellin' ya, I've had to leave more things unresolved than I care to remember. My typical response? Say what? WHY? HOW? Ummm...NO. There must be something I can do. Your word says so, God. This isn't right!

While it's true that God's word does guide us in how to resolve conflict within the body of Christ, I've learned through a great deal of pain, heartache, and experience that it doesn't always turn out rosy. Just as it takes two to tango, it takes two to make peace. So as sad as it is to leave things messy, sometimes that is exactly what God asks us to do. No amount of anger or pain (even justified anger or pain) is worth giving up what I have with Jesus. I've gotta let go of the darkness to walk in the Light.

Does this answer all the questions I have? Not even close. I am a work in progress and becoming like Christ is a process. So I will continue to "work out my salvation with fear and trembling" {Phil. 2}; I will think on what is true, pure, and right {Phil. 4}; and I will trust God to do what he does best - change hearts and lives - the greatest miracle of all {2 Cor. 5:17}. I'd love to hear how God has, or is, helping you through your pain. We can always learn from and love one another!

Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. {Ephesians 4:32}